Reaching Flow

I’ve been staring at my laptop screen for a few minutes now trying to write the first sentence of this post. There is so much I want to write, but can’t seem to find the right words. What is it about writing that challenges me so much? And perhaps more interestingly, what does it mean when I say I want to become a better writer this year?

I think it was my mom who first told me that I could be a writer. That was 7 years ago when I still wrote in Hebrew. I had just arrived to Australia and I was lonely, so for few months I wrote a series of emails about my life in a new country. Writing was my refuge, my way to rip all the loneliness out of me. The topic was Australia but underneath it was just a way to make sense of the world inside of me.

My second significant attempt with writing was in English. Same as the first time I used writing as a way to share and reflect upon life’s journeys. A trip to Los Angeles, my Ironman journey or simply a random Sydney weekend escape, I played with the words of my limited English vocabulary like a new toy.

And that’s probably why I love writing.

It’s like a toy for me. The words move like puzzle pieces in my head, pushing and jostling to find their resting place on an unbounded and limitless board. As I go along, new words join and the number of puzzle pieces increases, making the game even more compelling and in the same time, challenging.

I’m staring at my laptop screen again. The flow of words have stopped again. I want them to flow but they are silent, not responding. If there is one big thing I would like to achieve with my writing goal this year, it’s exactly that. I would like to write from a place in which words come from nowhere and everywhere.

The concept of Flow

The book, “flow”, written by a psychology professor during his 25 years of research on happiness, best explains the concept of flow; “The state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter”. It is “what the sailor holding a tight course feels when the wind whips through his hair” and “what a painter feels when the colors on the canvas begin to set up a magnetic tension with each other”.

In flow, we feel a “deep sense of enjoyment that is long cherished and that becomes a landmark in memory for what life should be like.” We become totally absorbed in an activity and it feels effortless and fluid. Self consciousness is abandoned and there is no room for distractions from the outside world.

Imagine yourself lying on an operating table during a surgical procedure while your surgeon’s mind wanders. His attention is scattered all over, absorbed in last night’s basketball game or the paycheck he will receive. You wouldn’t want like to lie on that table, would you?

Luckily, most surgeons have the ability to focus their attention and energy into the present moment. Having consciously disengaged from the external world they arrive to the present moment and into a state of flow. This leads to an interesting point; flow is not just a random event, but can be generated voluntarily and for long periods of time.

Reaching Flow Consciously

Try to remember a time in which you were completely engrossed in the moment, oblivious to your surroundings. Perhaps this hyper-focused moment was on a rollercoaster, during a big game, or dancing with a childhood crush. We’ve all been there at some point of our lives but what’s interesting to me is how to get there consciously

When I look closely at some of my flow moments over the past few years, I can see patterns and common characteristics that have occurred.

1. Objective

Perhaps the most consistent pattern in the quest of reaching flow is the existence of a clear objective. In every area of our lives, flow is experienced when the heart, desire and mind are all in alignment and when objectives are defined and well formulated.

I always felt as if I was going to accomplish something meaningful, even if it wasn’t obvious at first. For example, a few years ago I decided to dedicate a whole year to intense socializing. I went out 7 nights a week, chatted with complete strangers, and party hopped all night long. On the surface it may seem that all I looked for in life was pleasure, however my underlying and primary motivation was a bit different.

Let me explain. At the time, I was living in Australia on a temporary student visa and considering whether to pursue permanent residency. My English level was fairly average and most of my friends were students. Basically, I felt like a visitor. I decided that in order to stay and adopt Australia as a home I would need a dramatic shift. I had to scrub myself of my “visitor” identity and become a resident. A big part of this transformation was learning and reaching a comfort level with my English. Socializing catered to this transformation brilliantly and I was in a state of flow almost every night.

2. Passion

When we love someone we give him/her our full attention. Likewise, when we are passionate about something we melt into flow, seamless with the moment and activity. For me, one of my biggest passions, running, is a sure way for me to reach flow.

Before I set out for a run, I am filled with a feeling of sheer excitement, knowing that the rest of my world is about to go away for a short while and re-appear even sharper later.

Once I’m running I feel the nirvana of being one with my surroundings and the trail itself. I often surrender myself to the sensations of tiredness and embracing pain while experiencing joy. Some of my most elated moments are experienced during running.

3. Challenge

Boredom sets in quickly when we choose an activity that is too easy whereas, if the activity is too demanding, we may become frustrated. In both cases we are likely to give up on something of paramount importance for us. The more we situate ourselves between the two polars and set the right amount of challenge, the more flow will be experienced. I am currently putting this into practice with my surfing.

In the past, I was out there trying to ride big waves, exhausting myself within the first moment. The challenge was too great and I indeed gave up on my surfing crusade. Nowadays, however, I look for beaches with relatively small waves, which are challenging enough for me to want to be there consistently.

Do I get to experience flow every time I try to catch a small wave? The answer is no, but it does happen, and I know that with a bit more skills, surfing will be one of the best gifts. This brings me to the next point.

4. Skillfulness

Without holding the proper skills, we are unlikely to extract the maximum enjoyment out of what we do which can lead to a loss of interest. This is usually where willpower comes in and keeps us going after the initial “motivation” has died.

However, willpower is a scarce resource and determination alone might not be enough to acquire a certain degree of competence. It is through the practice of daily rituals and habits of behavior that we are able to consistently work towards self-mastery.

As with every big goal I’ve ever set for myself, immersion and instilled habits were the key. I’ve put myself out there, even when I was not comfortable, and my skills were soon well developed enough to be able to attain my dreams.

5. Beliefs

Our belief structure is like the operating system of the mind. I believe this belief system guides every action and reaction that we do or do not take. We have all adopted beliefs along the way by gathering information through personal experience and absorbing ideas from other people. Some of these beliefs do not serve us in the long run and, in fact, may limit us from expressing our highest potential.

Throughout my life I had to banish limiting beliefs about my self and my abilities to reach my goals. What I have learned is that it is possible to choose new beliefs about myself almost immediately, without even the evidence or the relevant reference experience. This is something I’ve chosen to do with my writing.

Reflecting

The reasons for not reaching flow in my writing are now becoming apparent. These include: confusion over my purpose in writing, insufficient vocabulary skills, disguised perfectionism, and a few limiting beliefs. The end product is quite satisfactory but it comes with sweat and great effort. This one post for example took me a few days to complete. I had to stop and restart occasionally using thoughts of willpower and discipline to fulfill my writing resolution.

Knowing these reasons makes a difference though. The self reflection exhibited in this post is often all we need to propel us to action. I’ve already formed new habits around vocabulary and cleared up some limiting beliefs during the process. More than anything, I know that flow will come, if not this year, then the next, or whenever. The desire, passion and all the right reasons are there to make it happen.

Live your dreams.
Tal

Tweet

Email